Boy, have I opened a can of cavities by going to the dentist. I’m in a LOT OF PAIN FROM ONE SILLY TOOTH, and the weird thing is it hurts worse when I lie down! So I may to stay upright for the next ten days, until I get into the dentist.

Toothaches are like headaches – they make you feel consumed by pain, and unable to think. Compared to this, Fibro Fog feels like I’d still have enough clarity to win Double Jeopardy.

I’ve been to Dr. Google and all the advice for tooth pain keeps coming back to the most popular by far: get drunk! Whisky appears to be the home remedy of choice. It’s a clear favorite over wrapping the tooth in peanut butter, sealing it with Super Glue, or hitting myself in the head (distraction principle).

I hate the taste of alcohol, you may remember my children have prohibited me from using Super Glue ever since I glued my eyes shut, and peanut butter is fattening. So that leaves head hitting.

Hmmmm … think I’ll rummage through my interesting (and copius) collection of drugs first. I have a wonderful selection of sedatives that don’t work, and a terrific variety of pain killers. Between them, I’m sure I can whip up something to subdue one stupid little tooth.

If not, where’s my hammer?

I’m just hittin’ …